Well … here we are.
1 year ago today I was talking with my mother for the last time. I was down at my mamaws house helping with some clean up and chatting with cousins, aunts, and uncle. I talked to her 3 times that day … Nikki did the same … several others spoke with her as well. She reminisced about mamaw, recalling her as one of her best friends especially after dad passed away. I had silenced my phone before heading into the gathering at the Vineyard that night. Forgetting to turn the ringer back on I would miss the phone call from the Nursing home and then the several calls from her husband Marvin. After breaking down and getting myself together I called my brother Jake and eventually headed out to his house. Sometime later we would gather at Mt. Zion and pay honor to her memory. Watching my brother speak … I guess it started to settle in that we are who we are because of both of our parents. In the end I think Jake and I have turned out alright. Both of us have married up, both have beautiful kids, involved in church, serving others, bettering ourselves through formal education and learning through necessity … I think mom and dad would be proud of us. They did a good job of letting us know they were proud of us when they were living here with us … but I think it continues.
I’m proud of my brother and the man he has become. I know we can get on each other’s nerves sometimes but I think that’s part of being siblings. I think I let him down sometimes … but all in all … we’re good.
The wife and I have kept all the various voicemails that mom left us in the last few months of her life. Because of this Nikki was able to hear mom wish her a happy birthday last week. I often play the call where mom stood on her own after months in bed with two broken legs. In blessings & mysteries of eternity we know they are not really gone. The memories of our mind and heart keep her close but technology seems to give a whole new life to remembering a loved one. Videos, pictures, voice mails; all of them together make it tactile to our physical being. The time will come when we don’t need these things and we’ll be united in eternity together again; for now however they will stir our memories forever.
One day I’ll combine these messages that are appropriate and post them. For now though … if you knew my mother I pray that you’ll remember her in kindness. I’d love it if you would share a story or two as a way of honoring her. They may make it into a book for her grandkids one day, who knows.